Ok, what I have to reveal today is gonna BLOW... YOUR... MINDS!!!
You see, I had the opportunity to visit Philadelphia a few days ago. In addition to getting to see Independence Hall and the Liberty Bell, I also had a close encounter with the Squirrel Kind.
What do I mean by that? Well, we were outside eating ice cream, when all of a sudden, we saw a squirrel. But this wasn't just any squirrel. This squirrel was out for blood. He glared us very intensely, almost like he was sizing us up. In the end nothing happened, but it made us all distinctly uncomfortable.
Why do I bring this all up? Because it's further evidence for something I've suspected for a long time.
You see, squirrels are planning to take over the world. I know, it may sound crazy, but hear me out. Squirrels have been gathering nuts for thousands of years at this point. Almost like their preparing for something... Like, for instance, oh, I don't know, TAKING OVER THE WORLD?!!!
It's genius really. Squirrels may seem like some of the dumbest living things on God's green Earth, but it's all just an act to lure us into a false sense of security while they plot the downfall of the entire human race, and the founding of the Squirrel Reich.... Wait... What's that?!... Oh no, it's... IT'S!... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
This blog has officially been taken over by the Squirreluminatti. You didn't see anything.
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